The Lord has been showing me so many awesome things lately that I don’t know which direction to go😊. My heart has been around block after block with healing, revelation, learning and living what I have seen from Him. It’s a good place to be for me. Just so thankful that He never gives up on us and that His mercies are new every morning. Today I’m going to share some vital truths I’m learning to walk by faith in. His Truths. Some I may have shared many times in the last 9-10 months but His truths and all He has done for me and my family are worth saying again.
In 3 John 2 it says, “Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers.” Our soul is our mind, will and emotions. He’s spoken this verse over and over to my heart for the last 3 or 4 weeks. I know this verse but until recently haven’t taken it to heart like I am now. The Healing University classes have been so packed full of His Word and truth that I can say without a doubt that God wants me well. God wants you well. It’s like we know that truth and believe that but don’t make the choice in our lives to let it be a real part of us. I’m going to share a bit of a testimony.
My main physical issues, or at least those that have my attention a lot, have been a hip, knee, and sciatic. I do more physical work than I probably should do and have abused my body so I guess when these aches and pains come I pray and go on the best I can. The first huge attack came 2 ½ years ago when my rolfer (deep tissue massage+) hit something that caused deep pain in my sciatic. At first I thought maybe she went too deep but then the Lord brought to my mind that this was just days after my cousin, who I was helping take care of, we found passed away in her sleep. She was 56. This is a LONG story but I was carrying some emotional stuff with her before she passed – some guilt and anger. So I crippled around in pain a year or so seeking answers and help and dealing with my heart issues. Then one day just like that my chiropractor adjusted me just right and the pain was almost gone, but my inner hurts had been getting healed too.
I fell really hard on my right knee a couple times and had some slight knee issues but I kept going. I was going through extreme emotional heaviness with Mom’s husband not doing well with his cancer treatments and she was with us off and on during his hospital stays. I was getting an adjustment from my chiropractor and something happened to my knee that left me in so much pain for almost 2 years. Then just like that after some healing in my heart, my rolfer hit just the right spot on my knee and I can walk up and down stairs now without holding on to the rail! It was so exciting and amazing to me. I used to watch people on TV shows run up and down stairs and wondered if I would ever do that again. I’m not running but getting close. But I had dealt with some of the issues of my heart that I was taken on myself and released so much of that heaviness.
Then is September, just days after Ed’s cousin had passed away I was getting rolfed and it triggered something in my lower back and side that has kept me from being able to bend, twist, turn or sit without so much pain. Even though I know I’m hard on my body all these happened when I was going through extreme emotionally painful times. And I am just starting to catch on to 2 John 3, “Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers.” To me this verse is saying that the well-being and the health of my mind, will and emotions effect my health and everything else in my life. The problem is I don’t usually pay attention to my hurting soul at that time because the physical is so overwhelming. It’s basically a lie from the enemy that keeps our focus on what will bring healing and that is renewing our minds to His truths and promises. Every issue we have has to go through our mind, will and emotions and we have the choice of believing His Ways or doubting the truths.
I’ve shared much of my hurts in weekly writings and how the Lord continues to minister to my heart. It’s been 10 months since Caleb’s death and 9 months since Mom was left with us. I can lookback and see the depth of my broken, trampled heart. I justified anger in my heart. The Word says to be angry and sin not. I was sinning because I wanted vengeance. I justified speaking words that were not life giving. I definitely wasn’t keeping a guard on my heart.
I knew that I knew that I knew that Mom was to be here. On the Tuesday after she was left here I was standing at the kitchen window and I heard so clearly, “You saved her life”. Have I doubted those words? No. Have I doubted my ability to care for her? Yes. My Mom has always been a wonderful, God loving, praying Mom. As a child I was raised in religion and legalism. I always heard about what I couldn’t do – don’t dance, don’t play cards, don’t go to a movie, don’t wear certain clothes or listen to certain music. It was a works salvation. Do good, be good, do it right and you might get to heaven. After my Dad died when I was 10 Mom remarried and that Dad believed all work, no play, no church, no fun. This is actually when we moved to Conifer and we went to Mountain High Chapel for a season. Now that Mom has come to be with us, I am finding that I am having some childhood heart issues popping up, mostly that I am not being good enough or doing enough. Even though I do know the truth of my identity in Christ, I let the religious spirit creep back in. I was fighting it with His Word and by faith daily but somehow the burdens, the words and expectations of others on top of the pain just wore me down. A day of not breaking down in tears was unusual.
On top of that add not feeling good, the grief of friends passing away, financial issues, Helping Mom through her time and divorce, well, it was hard because the squeaky wheel got the oil. I never gave up or gave in and so thankful I knew His truths. His mercies are new every morning. Joy comes in the morning! Ed and I stayed strong and together in Him. Ed’s patience was amazing. Yet, to add to this equation Ed’s hurts, anger and wanting to stand for what was right with Caleb. His grief in losing his cousin and all that came with that was a tough place to be. He is the one that has to preach the services of friends that have died. Only through the power of the Lord can he do that. Then Mom’s hurts, rejection hopelessness, feeling lost, unwanted, useless and very condemning of herself – well this little house was filed with pain and hurt. BUT NONE of us were about to give in to the enemy. We learned patience, endurance, perseverance, faith, abundant love, hope-filled future, total healing ad health. As we continue to let the Lord work in our mind, will and emotions, we continue to know we are healed.
I’m ready for spring😊. I’m ready for winter to be over and to see the new life of all the seeds we have sown for months and didn’t even realize we were sowing. Through all the hard times we prayed together in this home almost daily. We encouraged one another, stood on His promises, submitting to Him, resisting the enemy and knowing the enemy had to flee. The burdens we have carried sometimes on our own are being lifted as we cast our cares on Him. We are receiving our healings and as we are healing, prosperity in every area of our lives is happening. We are choosing to renew our minds daily in His Word, His promises and His truths. Compared to what is now happening in the world , the last 2 years seem like light affliction. We definitely have no time to be sick, beaten down, in self-pity, strife, anger, vengeance, have doubt or worry, or pain. We must know in our hearts Who our Lord and Savior is, who we are in Him without a shadow of doubt. We are to be overflowing in the Holy Spirit Who is our teacher, comforter and will guide us in all truth. Jesus gave us the Holy Spirit when He ascended into heaven. Without the power of the Holy Spirit in me, in us – we may not have known that we can do all through Christ and that we can rise above all the circumstances of life.
We walk by faith not by sight. We have made up our minds, we have made up our will and we have made up our emotions and we choose this day Whom we will serve! We praise Him and rejoice daily that He is always with us. First thing each morning Mom and I tell each other, “This is the day the Lord has made, let us be glad and rejoice in it!!” Choose today the Lord!