May 14, 2023
Happy Mother’s Day!! What a wonderful day to celebrate! I’ve been thinking a lot about Moms, Mothers, Mommys this past week. I’m so thankful we have a special day to celebrate the women in our lives. The first woman came out of man but every man came out of a woman, a mother,  (and of course, other woman did too). I feel so blessed to be a woman and mom. There are the challenges that come with life no matter what gender we are but in Him we are overcomers, victorious and more than conquerors. Today I want to share some promises and wisdom from God’s Word to encourage all women, even if you are not a physical mom, but we all had a mom that gave us birth and life. For that we should all be thankful.
 
Being a woman or mom is difficult especially in the culture of today. Without Biblical guidance and wisdom there are no real definitions that describe a woman. We’ve seen people not even know how to define a woman. That sounds silly but if you don’t know the truth of God’s Word how would you really know anymore. When I was growing up a woman or mom was the keeper of the home. She was the nurturer, the comforter, the one who could kiss away the boo-boo. She did laundry, even knew what an iron was for😊, packed our lunches and cooked meals. She prayed for you at bedtime, prayed before you went to school, had a Bible beside her chair and you knew she was praying many more times a day. Now with time a woman or mom has changed to some point. I think most women have nurturing tendencies in one area or another. Women now have careers and work hard outside the home as well as in keeping a home. If we looked deep inside, we usually know the truth about who God created us to be, but then the world, men and others try to tell us different. Motherhood is the same. Deep down a mommy usually has a God-given instinct that helps her know what is best for her child, because she hears it from Him, but then again, the world and others get involved and make the role of a woman and mom look so insignificant and ever changing. The woman God created that came out of man is not ever changing and invaluable. Times change but our identity as a woman built and put together by God does not change. He knew what He was doing and created a beautiful creation.
 
Some like myself, grew up with a wonderful, God loving Mom. Some didn’t and just like those who didn’t have a great father influence we must learn to move past that and only see our identity in our Creator. We can not base who we are today by our past. There are situations, hurts and abuses that we could blame our identity on or judge that parent who wasn’t all we needed or what God had meant for us to have. However, our faithful Father has already taken care of our every need and given us every thing we need for a glorious life in Him. We all have something we could blame on someone from our past but we have no right to hold on to that because Jesus went to the cross and died for it already. He knew there would be hurts and abuses so He took it upon Himself to rid those situations once and for all. If we know Him then He lives in us and we are in Him. There is no room for hurts, offenses and judgements. Now, we can find a way to work the hurts into our hearts and push His ways aside. We all find ourselves doing that once in a while. It’s not that we push Him aside with our attitudes but it is when we believe the lies and keep Him away that destroys our lives. We will have the thoughts but we must always take that thought captive and just focus on Him. Not sure why I wrote all that, but I believe it was for someone.
 
Our children usually come into our lives as tiny, helpless babies. We give our all to take care of them until they can do a little on their own. As toddlers they are still pretty dependent on us but as they grow, they become more independent. For myself, one the greatest challenges of motherhood was knowing when to let go. One day I realized that these little ones were just like every other person that has ever lived, they were created by Him and were His. God created each of us in our mother’s wombs. We were not accidents according to His plan. “You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.” Psalm 139:13-14
His workmanship is marvelous! Now comes the hard part, each child is created by Him. We must give our children back to Him and let Him guide us as we train and love them. The only Book that gives you the complete instructions on motherhood from conception throughout their whole lives is God’s Word. Other books have some information, some from God’s plan and so much from man’s ideas apart from God. We think we know life better than the Maker. Look at our world. Man has taken into his own hands the process of raising up a child that was made in the image of God and made, built by God. How do we think we can take someone else’s creation and have success with doing with it what we want? That never works.
 
At the same time that this child is being knit together inside a woman, He is creating a mother. Those little ones that live next to a mother’s heart will always be on a mother’s heart no matter their age. I don’t see my 5 children as others see them, I see them created by God inside me and always a part of me. A mother’s heart knows when her children are hurting without hearing a word. She knows when they are struggling when she hasn’t seen them maybe for years. Like God, He created us and always knows our hearts even when we don’t acknowledge Him. The desire of a mother longs to protect, nurture, guide, sometimes control their child. These are all great things in the natural but we soon find out that we can’t do it in ourselves. It doesn’t work with our own agendas and desires. The only way to influence and guide a child is through the instruction manual given by the Creator. It is not easy. It hurts our hearts to see what our children are doing and what they are thinking. Young moms with toddlers do not believe me when I say that this is one of the easiest times of motherhood. This is the time you are still training them up and have more say so in their lives. As they grow, we pray that what we have instilled in them they will heed. Then someday they are adults and on their own. A mom’s heart is still just as close as ever and it is so hard to watch them make mistakes, hopefully learn from their mistakes, and always with a heart of prayer you are believing they will give and trust their lives to Jesus.
 
If we are not staying close to our Savior, we will let fear get in our hearts and fear leads to nothing good or God. That fear we have for our child will cause us to do things that push them away. The cure for fear is faith. Motherhood is a walk of faith like nothing else we do. The greatest way to know your child and what your child needs is for you, as a mother, to know – in an intimate way – the love and ways of our Lord. We can never know His will when our will is most important to us. That happens a lot when it comes to raising and influencing our children. As our children grow, we must have a hands-off approach. We must be willing for things to be out of our control and in His hands. As long as we are holding on too tight, our children cannot not hold on to Him. We must submit our will, our plans, our attitudes, and need for things to be as we want them to Him and then trust Him. We must be able to let go and say, “Take over, Lord, I can do nothing without You!” “Everyone who knows Your wonderful name keeps putting their trust in You. They can count on You for help no matter what. O Lord, You will never, no never, neglect those who come to You.” Psalm 9:10
 
What have I learned from the last 49 years of mothering? I have learned that I cannot love anyone without Him, Who is love. I cannot not take credit for the love I have for my children, it’s His love that He has given me and I steward that love with tender care and great thankfulness. I have given myself to a lifetime of knowing Him. ”For my determined purpose is that I may know Him, that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly, and that I may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection which it exerts over believers.” Philippians 3:10 The greatest thing any woman can do is take time for the Lord, to give her all to Him and not her family. When He has your all, He is your all and it will work out for all. “For all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28
 
No matter where you are today in your walk of motherhood know He cares for you more than anything you can imagine. Many will have a difficult Mother’s Day. He knows your hurts, your losses, your griefs, your sorrows. Trust Him with all your heart. Don’t lean on your own understanding. It’s His love in you that will bring comfort. He knows your heart because He created you and cares. They can count on You for help no matter what. All women need to pray for one another. I say blessings and love to all you women on this special day. What a joy to be a woman! “For in him we live and move and exist. As some of your[ own poets have said, ‘We are his offspring.’” Acts 17:28

April 30, 2023
Lately, the Lord has been bringing this song to my mind almost daily. We first learned this song in the mid 1990’s. We would be in a group of worshippers and sing this with every part of our being. Whose people will you believe? I WILL BELIEVE THE REPORT OF THE LORD!!!!!
 
Whose report will you believe
(We shall believe the report of the Lord)
Whose report will you believe
(We shall believe the report of the Lord)
Whose report will you believe
(We shall believe the report of the Lord)
Whose report will you believe
(We shall believe the report of the Lord)

His report says I am healed
His report says I am filled
His report says I am free
His report says victory

Are you healed (Yes)
Are you filled (Yes)
Have you got the victory (Yes)
Are you healed (Yes)
Are you filled (Yes)
Have you got the victory (Yes)


There’s a lot more to those words than just a joyful song. I WILL BELIEVE HIS REPORT! The next question is what is His report? “But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.’ ” Matthew 4:4 His Word is the report we believe. All of us know the thousands of words and promises that are in the Bible. We believe in His Word. We love to read His Word, especially the verses that are full of His promises. The part many miss is KNOWING His Word in our hearts to the point that we always know what is His report. Many places in the Word talk about to know, this is to know intimately. To know His report, His Word, His Truth without a shadow of a doubt, we must spend some intimate time in His presence and in His Word.
 
As a child we were taught to memorize many things; poems, Bible verses, pledges, creeds. We memorized what was important to have hidden in our hearts. “Your word I have hidden in my heart, That I might not sin against You.” Psalm 119:11 People say that they can not memorize but you can know, in an intimate way, His word so well that it is hidden in your heart. When the time arises and you need to know whose report is truth, God’s or the Doctors?  God’s or man’s understanding? God’s or the world’s system? You will not know His report unless you spend time knowing Him.
 
“You see, every child of God overcomes the world, for our faith is the victorious power that triumphs over the world. So who are the world conquerors, defeating its power? Those who believe that Jesus is the Son of God.” 1 John 5:4-5 TPT
 
This past week I have been focusing on the victory we have in Him. We are overcomers, more than conquerors in Him. There should be no doubt in our hearts, or minds concerning His Truth about any situation. Yet, it is easy, at times, to get caught up in doubt and unbelief because we have been focusing on our own understanding. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him (know Him intimately) and He will direct your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6
 
“You’re my place of quiet retreat, and your wraparound presence becomes my shield as I wrap myself in your Word!” Psalm 119:114
 
This week the Lord took me to Psalm 23. This is a comforting chapter in His word that most people know or have heard of. As I read it from the perspective of His report for me, I was so blessed to see all He promises. Sometimes we recite it so fast we are not knowing it in our hearts.  When the enemy tries to lie about who I am and Who my Lord is in my life I just compare the report of the Lord with the lies of the enemy and I know I have victory in every situation.
 
“Yahweh is my best friend and my shepherd. I always have more than enough.
 
He offers a resting place for me in His luxurious love. His tracks take me to an oasis of peace near the quiet brook of bliss.
 
That’s where he restores and revives my life. He opens before me in the right path and leads me along in his footsteps of righteousness so that I can bring honor to his name.
 
Even when your path takes me through the valley of deepest darkness, fear will never conqueror me, for you already have. Your authority is my strength and my peace. The comfort of your love takes away my fear, I’ll never be lonely, for you are near.
 
You become my delicious feast even when my enemies dare to fight. You anoint me with the fragrance of your Holy Spirit; you give me all I can drink of you until my cup overflows.
 
So why would I fear the future? Only goodness and tender love pursue me all the days of my life. Then afterward, when my life is through, I’ll return to your glorious presence to be forever with you.” Psalm 23 TPT
 
Take time to start putting His report, His promises, His Truths in your heart. It will save you many times when you are a situation and need to know His report to stand on. I pray you enjoy these verses and promise as much as I have.
 
Whose report will you believe?
His report says I am healed!
His report says I am filled!
His report says I am free!
His report says victory!
 
AMEN!!!
​

​April 23, 2023
I sure have enjoyed the few beautiful spring days mixed in with the moisture. Gave us a chance to find what was hidden under snow banks since December😊 I opened up windows and doors and let the refreshing, healing sunshine flow through. One morning this week I was even able to sit outside and read His Word. I was wrapped in a blanket but what a joy it was to sit and listen to the birds sing their song, watch the deer in the pasture, drink some coffee and listen to His voice. Many times, I hear Him so much better outside. He’s been talking to us a lot and we’ve been listening. Guess He is always talking to us but we don’t always take time to hear. I have been taking special time to sit and soak and receive healing in my achy body. My pain is so much less when my focus is on Him. He has been dealing with our hearts about many things, the simple things we sometimes get going and ignore. One issue of the week was judgment. That was a real heart issue we didn’t realize how much was in our hearts. He talked to us about what we have been magnifying and focusing on. We had made some mountains out of molehills for sure. Then truth, His Truth, and how easy it is to compromise a bit here and there, even unconsciously. Trust and leaning not on our own understanding came up in a few conversations with our Lord. Repenting followed all these heart issues as we chose to send away the hurts, and issues, change our minds to be according to His Word and turn and go the other way.


The Lord has also been showing us about having His peace that passes all understanding and His joy that lives in us that is unspeakable and full of glory. What He wants me to share with you today is His hope. Hope is the earnest expectation of good. We hope for what is unseen. Once it is seen, we can no longer have to hope in that. I will mostly be sharing His Word on His hope. Take time to hide some of these verses in your heart so you can remember them when things start looking hopeless.
 
“Now faith brings our hopes into reality and becomes the foundation needed to acquire the things we long for. It is all the evidence required to prove what is still unseen.” Hebrews 11:1
 
Whenever we have expectations on people, places, things or positions we have put our hope in what can fail. When people, places, things or positions fail us, which they will, we can lose hope in everything. We can only have our true hope in Jesus. No matter what plans you make, how well they are thought through, without them being the plans of our Father, they will fail to satisfy you. “For I’m releasing these words to you this day, yes, even to you, so that your living hope will be found in God alone, for he is the only one who is always true.” Proverbs 22:19
 
The only truth we can count on without doubt and put all our trust, hope, expectations and anticipation in is our Lord and Savior. Anything you expect, hope or anticipate beyond Him will not satisfy the longing inside you.
 
“Here’s what I’ve learned through it all: Don’t give up; don’t be impatient; be entwined as one with the Lord. Be brave and courageous, and never lose hope. Yes, keep on waiting—for he will never disappoint you!” Psalm 27:14
 
“Human strength and the weapons of man are false hopes for victory; they may seem mighty, but they will always disappoint.” Psalm 33:17
 
“He’s the hope that holds me and the stronghold to shelter me, the only God for me, and my great confidence.” Psalm 91:2
 
“Your future is bright and filled with a living hope that will never fade away.”
Proverbs 23:18
 
“But hold your hope firmly to the end and you will experience life and deliverance.” Matthew 24:13
 
“Glory to God in the highest realms of heaven! For there is peace and a good hope given to the sons of men.” Luke 2:14
 
“God sent his word to the Jewish people first, announcing the wonderful news of hope and peace through Jesus, the Anointed One, the Lord of all.” Acts 10:36
 
“Against all odds, when it looked hopeless, Abraham believed the promise and expected God to fulfill it. He took God at his word, and as a result he became the father of many nations. God’s declaration over him came to pass: “Your descendants will be so many that they will be impossible to count!”
Romans 4:18
 
“Our faith guarantees us permanent access into this marvelous kindness that has given us a perfect relationship with God. What incredible joy bursts forth within us as we keep on celebrating our hope of experiencing God’s glory!” Romans 5:2
 
“And this hope is not a disappointing fantasy, because we can now experience the endless love of God cascading into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who lives in us!” Romans 5:5
 
“For this is the hope of our salvation. But hope means that we must trust and wait for what is still unseen. For why would we need to hope for something we already have?” Romans 8:24
 
“Let this hope burst forth within you, releasing a continual joy. Don’t give up in a time of trouble, but commune with God at all times.” Romans 12:12
 
“Now may God, the fountain of hope, fill you to overflowing with uncontainable joy and perfect peace as you trust in him. And may the power of the Holy Spirit continually surround your life with his super-abundance until you radiate with hope!” Romans 15:13
 
“Living within you is the Christ who floods you with the expectation of glory! This mystery of Christ, embedded within us, becomes a heavenly treasure chest of hope filled with the riches of glory for his people, and God wants everyone to know it!” Colossians 1:27
 
Keep your mind and heart focused on the only true Hope. He is the only hope that is beyond a shadow of doubt. If you find yourself doubting Him and His love, then take extra time to get into the Word and know His love is true and never fails. Expect ONLY good from Him. Let all your hope and earnest expectations of good be in Him alone and watch how He will minister to your heart.
 
Everything else in this world will disappoint and fail you. No matter what efforts you put forth in anything you do, it will never satisfy or fulfill the deep longing in your heart that only He can fill. Give Him a chance to be your All in all. “So now wrap your heart tightly around the hope that lives within us, knowing that God always keeps his promises!”
Hebrews 10:23
 
 

​April 16, 2023     HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO US!!!
Yesterday marked 45 years of marriage for Ed and I. This past week so many memories have been flooding my heart. Like most people that have been married for many years, the adventures were many. I wasn’t sure what I was going to write today but I am going to share how a very dysfunctional couple of kids made it to this point. Many of you know our story and many don’t. It’s a story of unconditional love, trusting the Lord and miracles. Mixed in there were many hard times. Not just a hard time here or there but years upon years of struggles and hurt. We are so thankful for the unconditional love of our Lord Jesus and His faithfulness to always be with us. One of my favorite verses then and to this day is Proverbs 3:4-5, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.”
 
We were married on April 15, 1978. I wanted to get married outside and we did even though it was a bit cold. I was a 24-year-old widow with 3 little ones, ages 18 months, 3 and 4 years old. Ed was a 23-year-old business owner that was very independent and loved to drink at the bars. I knew the Lord and had prayed for the right husband and father for my children. Ed knew the Lord but didn’t walk with the Lord but heard Him speak to his heart the day of the wedding. We were not prime candidates for a perfect marriage. There were bets made the day of our wedding on how long it would last. Most didn’t give us a year. I understand the reasons and yet no one came to us with advice or hope for our new family. We were on our own and it was a rough start. I trusted the Lord to guide us in everything. Ed and I knew each other for years, my brother and Ed were best friends and our parents were best friends so that helped a little. Ed hadn’t drank the whole 4 months we went together and for 3 weeks afterwards! Then at my brother’s wedding the drinking began. I won’t go into details on that. Our last 45 years could be a book. I had to trust in the Lord and not try to understand any of it.
 
We were blessed to welcome our first child together, Adam, a year and a half after we were married. At Adam’s one year old check up the doctor heard a heart murmur which ended up being a hole in Adam’s heart. At 16 months old Adam had open heart surgery. We had lost our insurance because of the drinking. We wanted him to have the surgery at Children’s Hospital and through a series of miracles and God’s favor he was able to without insurance. As we sat by Adam’s bedside in ICU the Lord spoke to Ed and he dedicated his life back to the Lord. The whole thing from Adam being admitted to Children’s Hospital - to his successful surgery - to Ed’s life change was a miracle. We had trusted the Lord with all our hearts.
 
Then a couple months later as I was sitting back at Children’s hospital with Adam in a body cast from a broken femur bone (a table that had been leaned up against the wall here at church fell on him), I realized I was going to have another baby. This was not good news to anyone but us. People thought we were crazy, irresponsible, foolish, and they let us know their thoughts. We were struggling and still paying for Adam’s heart surgery but all I knew to do was trust the Lord with this new little one coming. It wasn’t planned but a gift from the Lord. Tim was born a few months later. By now we were going to church, Ed was not drinking and the day after Tim was born Ed went into ministry. He started working as a drug and alcohol counselor at a local rehab home for boys. There was not much pay, $400/month, but I was so blessed to have Ed growing in the things of the Lord that I did all I could to make the best of all we had. He worked there for 18 months. I had trusted the Lord with all my heart.
 
As life went on we focused on raising our children in the Lord. We always went to church, Mountain High Chapel😊. Our kids learned to work hard as we raised lots of animals, milked goats, canned our food, and did our best to bring them each up in the way they should go. Ed fell off the wagon and started drinking again for a few months and that was tough but he came to an end of himself and totally surrendered his life. He was always self-employed and sometimes things were good and sometimes they were tough. We put our trust in the Lord. Our marriage was ok. We knew we needed to learn more. We were so busy raising the kids and trying to make ends meet that we didn’t focus on us. Then one day we received a call from my sister-in-law that they had had a car accident and our 10-year niece was killed and 8-year-old nephew was on life support. Wow. I believed with everything in me that Matthew would live but he was taken off life support. About now I wasn’t sure how to trust in the Lord. The next year was so hard for me. I couldn’t imagine the pain my brother and family were going through. I knew the pain of a car accident and I got so deep into grief that I got depressed and just went through the motions of life. It wasn’t a good thing. I didn’t want to praise the Lord at church. I didn’t want to do anything but cry. This was hard on our marriage, and I knew it. It was tough to come out of but I knew I had to for my family. When my Grandpa died a year later it’s like my grief for the kids was released and I began to heal. Didn’t make sense but I walked through healing for the grief. I had to trust in the Lord again.
 
About then we met some awesome new friends who had a marriage ministry. We became very involved in it and watched our marriage grow and heal. We taught marriage classes for years with so much fruit. We didn’t have help when we were young and wanted every marriage to have all the tools they needed for a healthy relationship. We started to do weddings which included pre and post counseling. Our heart was for marriages. We were so thankful ours was healing that we wanted that for everyone. And we still do. After we were married 16 years, we began to pastor Mountain High Chapel full time. It was very challenging. One of our focuses, even then, was marriages and family because the enemy is out to destroy every Christian marriage and family. By then our children were going out into the world. Our daughter traveled to India at 18 and stayed there by herself after the team returned. TRUSTING IN THE LORD! Two of our sons were riding the rodeo circuit. Our kids were in different parts of the country and world. All I knew to do was trust the Lord with all my heart and lean not on my understanding.
 
We began to travel to other countries. We were already traveling to many states sharing the unconditional love of the Lord and marriage tools. Our 1st mission trip was with our youth group to Russia and Ukraine. While we were in the Ukraine we found out our daughter was seriously ill in a hospital in Uganda with malaria. We had to trust the Lord with her. Then we started building orphanages in other countries. We went to Venezuela for about 10 years, then Kenya, Peru and India building orphanages. So many times, there was no money to go but we knew we were called to go so we made plans and went forward. Our 1st mission trip to Russia Ed would say we would not go if we didn’t have money for this or that and the enemy made sure we didn’t have money. We decided to speak we would go no matter what, trust the Lord and we’ve gone everywhere He has told us to go. We went to India, Peru and Kenya in 2018. In 2019 we were in Peru and Israel. We are believing to go to Kenya this November. So amazing as we trust Him.
 
Throughout the years we have lost family and friends, had heartaches, church splits, financial hardships, family divorces, broke friendships, a fire took our barn, my Dad passed away, Ed’s parents passed away, we lost a grandson but we had to keep going and trust the Lord. When we were in Afghanistan visiting our daughter and family a few years ago, our son, Tim, had compartment syndrome in his leg from being kicked by a bucking horse. He drove home alone from a rodeo in California, and we couldn’t even help him. But we trusted the Lord with him and he didn’t lose his leg. Tim had a stroke 8 years ago and they said he would not live. We stood together in our marriage and rebuked that lie. Tim was in rehab in Colorado Springs for 3 months and we drove there every day. We did this together. We stayed strong in our marriage no matter what and believed together for his healing. Just a couple weeks ago when Josh was in the hospital, and we were headed to Tucson we wanted so badly to turn around and come home. The Lord had told us a week before that something was going to try and keep us from going. We didn’t understand that and knew we had heard to go to Tucson now. He told us mile after mile as we drove the wrong direction of our child in the hospital to trust Him. To this day we don’t know what was so important in AZ that we had to go then but we listened and went. It was hard but we trusted Him. We enjoyed our time and the sun and can’t lean on our own understanding. Through all the struggles and difficulties, we are still so blessed. Our kids all know Jesus and are serving Him in various ways. They are all teaching their children about Jesus and have strong Christian homes. Our kids are married to wonderful spouses, we have 25 grandchildren, 1 great grandchild born (2 more on the way😊), prosperity, health, a wonderful growing church, lasting friendships, love, joy, and opportunity to bless my Mom and we still focus on the Lord with all our heart, leaning not on our own understanding. We acknowledge Him and let Him direct our paths.
 
Our 45 years have been amazing. We started out as friends, and we are still best friends. We have love, honor and respect for one another. We seldom take each other for granted because we have learned to value our relationship and the time we have together. Ed is so good to me and helps me beyond what I ever thought. We get cranky once in a while, but we get over it. We learned to really know one another. We take time to know what makes the other feel loved and valued and then we honor that. We know each other’s gifts and callings and do all we can to help and support one another in ministry. We pray together every day. We share His Word together every day. We are thankful every day. We help each other every day. We rejoice together and Ed is so good to listen to me when I am in tears. We love unconditionally. We trust Him to guide us in all we do, every dream, vision, and situation. He is the cord that binds our lives together and we cherish that every day. 

April 9, 2023
RESURRECTION SUNDAY!!!
What a glorious day it is!! Each year I ask the Lord to give me a deeper revelation of the cross and His resurrection. I know what I have been told since I was a little girl and it was a truth and part of the death, burial and resurrection. I also know it is so much deeper than any of us can really imagine. I’ve been on a journey of really knowing His love. KNOWING. To know in an intimate way. I didn’t grow up with the concept of a Daddy’s love so this has been a journey to get to experience with my heavenly Father because I cannot even perceive it from natural experience.
 
God’s love for us was the reason He sent His Son to die on the cross. To understand the depth and evilness of sin helps us to grasp the truth that something had to be done if man was to have a deep and intimate relationship with the Father. That is what we were created for – communion, relationship, fellowship, a friend with God, the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. I am going to share tidbit of what I have been putting in my heart. Jesus didn’t just die to forgive us of our sins so we can escape hell. That is a very valuable benefit of the cross. For years that is all I knew. I did not realize the deepest desire of our Father’s heart was a relationship with Him. His love is truly beyond what I can image but it is my desire to know. Philippians 3:10 in the Amplified Bible is one of my greatest desires. “For my determined purpose is that I may know Him that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly, and that I may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection which it exerts over believers, and that I may so share His sufferings as to be continually transformed in spirit into His likeness even to His death, in the hope”
 
No amount of torture could kill Jesus. Only the soul that sins dies. Jesus knew no sin so death could not overpower Him. He submitted to death, not the events of the cross, but Jesus consciencely yielded His spirit, gave Himself over to death and into His Father’s hands. He could have stopped at anytime and called a legion of angels.
“Therefore My Father loves Me, because I lay down My life that I may take it again. No one takes it from Me, but I lay it down of Myself. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again. This command I have received from My Father.”
John 10:17-18
 
The Father wasn’t at a distance letting Jesus go through this on his own. “Namely, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their wrongdoings against them, and He has committed to us the word of reconciliation.” 2 Corinthians 5:19 NASB God wasn’t a distant observer but a part of the crucifixion. God didn’t send His Son to do what He would not do but He acted through Jesus to bring our redemption. The Godhead was still the Godhead even on the cross and it is sometimes hard to perceive with our limited minds. It’s important to see them working together doing what was necessary to destroy sin and set free those they loved. The Father, Son and Holy Spirit had a made a plan in the beginning and paid the price together because their desire was a relationship with man – with us- and it was lost to the choice Adam and Eve made. “For God made the only one who did not know sin to become sin for us, so that we might become the righteousness of God through out union with him.” 2 Corinthians 5:21 TPT
 
“In this act we see what real love is: it is not our love for God but his love for us when he sent his Son to satisfy God’s anger against our sins.” 1 John 4:10 TLB
 
“For God achieved what the law was unable to accomplish, because the law was limited by the weakness of human nature.” Romans 8:3 TPT
Our Father’s perspective does not focus on our personal sins but He focuses on the power of sin itself. It is not sinful people who were condemned but the entity of sin. Condemnation could not win over the Father’s power. In the physical body of Jesus, sin came face to face with the power of God and through His power, God has won over sin completely. He sees the evil that destroys His creation, the people He loves. “But God shows his anger from heaven against all sinful, wicked people who suppress the truth by their wickedness.” Romans 1:18 TLB
 
God is about destroying sin that destroys His people. When Jesus became sin for us, he entered into the full shame, darkness, and bondage of that sin. What if Jesus couldn’t see the Father when He on the cross and God’s wrath was consuming the sin he had become? Could that sin have blinded him and he felt forsaken by the Father? “For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:7-8 NKJV
 
“For God so loved the world He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16
 
“And this is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent.” John 17:3  God, the Father, loved so much He gave His Son so that we may know Him, the Father, the only true God and Jesus Christ whom He sent to die for us.
 
“And when Jesus had cried out with a loud voice, He said, “Father, ‘into Your hands I commit My spirit.’ ” Having said this, He breathed His last.” Luke 23:46 NKJV
Jesus committed his entire being into the Father’s hands and breathed his last breath. The horror of the cross had ended. Sin had been consumed. He trusted his father and committed himself to Him. In Paul’s writings in the Bible he tells us over and over that God’s work at the cross is the undeniable truth of how much He loves us. God loves us so much He gave His Son to devour the sin Adam and Eve’s choice brought into the world - the sin that separates us from our Father’s love and having a relationship. God went to great lengths to rescue us from our own, misdirected, self-absorbed and untrusting ways, so that we could be so close to Him that He would call us friend. “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.” John 15:13 NKJV
 
He wants us to trust Him, to trust His love. When we really grasp in our hearts the reality of the cross, the wedge of the enemy will be gone. When we truly KNOW in our hearts what our heavenly Father did for us we will trust Him and know deep within that His intentions are always love and relationship. Can we trust Him enough to say, “Into Your hands I commit my spirit?”
 
“I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith of the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.” Galatians 2:20 NKJV Paul, who wrote the book of Galatians, saw his life had ended when Jesus’ ended at the cross. He lived off Jesus’ faith, not his own faith. He let Jesus live in him and let Jesus’ trust in the Father stand for his. That is for us too!
 
On this Resurrection Day may we see His love is such a passionate way that we can say, “Into your hands I commit my spirit”. Can we know that sin was destroyed and we can now live our lives knowing how much He loves us and He lives in us? He died and rose again so we could fasten our faith and hope in Him alone. May we have a revelation from this day we celebrate His resurrection and learn to live loved.